As a mother, I feel so stretched thin sometimes. My day is never just a "nothing" day or relaxing all the way through. My laziest of days still require me to feed three meals to my older four, tidy up enough to make it liveable (lol), help with a toddler with potty training (and in a lot of cases, changing or cleaning her messes), nursing a baby 7 times and changing him just as many, entertaining the kids for about 12 hours, and being the referee all day. That is my LAZIEST day.
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| A pic from one of the first days that Jake had back to school |
A normal day? Everything listed above plus doing the dishes, laundry, cleaning up messes throughout the day, and being more active with the kids (i.e. taking them on walks when it isn't too hot). Bills and financial issues are also dealt with, including budgeting for grocery shopping and actually going out and doing it (today, for example, I took the older four with me to Ralph's - OH MY LANTA!!!!).
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| This is what happens when I get behind for a few days, literally |
****really proud of him by the way - he is doing very well and she has no concerns. She says he is a very hard worker and doesn't stop working until he's finished. Sometimes the other kids will stop when others do but not Jake. He works works works. She also said he is the nicest and sweetest kid. I couldn't be more proud :)!!!!****
I went over to Walmart to return something and buy a new purse (10 bucks heck yes! I'm cheap haha), a beard trimmer for my husband, and a strapless bra. I drove over to the gas station to fill my husband's car up and was about to go shopping when I got a text that he was going nuts and needed me home NOW! The poor guy had just worked the night shift and was exhausted... So I rushed home, fed the baby, got the older kids ready, and then it was off BACK to Walmart cuz the bra didn't fit - yay!
A few fits and wandering children later, we were back in my burning hot car, driving to Ralph's. That shopping trip was not fun. Hannah (2) thought it was funny to keep running off so that Jake (6) would chase after her, screaming. Lily (4) kept going alllll over the place... but Leah (4) was really well behaved. THANK YOU! At least one listened yaaaay! I was so excited to get the H out of there man! When I got home I threw together dinner, nursed the baby, and then got the kids ready for bed.
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| lol a random night. The dark pink is Leah, the green in the middle to the left is Hannah, and the light pink is Lily |
It took a while for the kids to unwind and get to sleep... but once they were out, I had to get baby boy down for the night. He didn't feel like cooperating tonight lol Took an hour and a half. I was able to run out and grab some sushi for me and my husband, though, in between rocking Micah (3 1/2 months) and feeding him, and made ANOTHER trip to to the grocery store (this time Albertsons) while I was out.
Once I got baby boy to sleep, I was able to workout on the elliptical for a little over a half hour, and then shower. I came down and folded some laundry for 20 mins and now here I am! YAY!
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| 32 down from Micah's pregnancy weight and bout 45 pounds to go till I'm at my goal weight! |
I guess that my workout can be considered "me time" but man... what about relaxing?! What about sitting my butt down to listen to music or talk to some people? Throughout the day I go on Facebook on my phone and talk to people, but it is ALWAYS while I'm doing other things. It's not like I'm just sitting there, zoning out. I always have an ear out for any brawls my kids are having.
I feel like mothers tend to forget about themselves as individuals a lot of the time. It is so rush, rush, rush, that we are too exhausted to do anything just for us... I got caught up in that for a while and started freaking out. A lot of the time I lose sleep just for the sake of being awake - all by myself - and having a moment of clarity (for example, right now - it is 2:20am and tomorrow I'm going to be feeling this poor decision lol but at least I got to write!).
As hard as it is... we NEED to make sure we leave time for ourselves. We have to find sitters (or husbands ;) haha) to watch the kids so we can go out for a few hours and eat dinner with friends - or go to a comedy club! I was able to do that a few weeks ago with some friends and it was AMAZING! It was really weird being "Becca" instead of just mommy for a night. It's like I'm ALWAYS looking for someone to help or something to do because I'm always in that mode.
And lucky to the guys who work and come home and have two days off and vacation time and holidays. Mothers don't get that! We work HARDER on holidays with organizing everything and making memories for our families. And days off? Forget about it! Really! It will never happen lol
What will get us through this tough season of motherhood?
- First of all... remember that our babies will grow up and be big and independent before we know it
- Second, when the time does come, we will have the rest of our lives to be "us" and find ourselves.
- One day at a time is a good mind-set.
- TAKE DAYS TO REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE A LADY and you existed before your children!
Being a mom is awesome - but don't go crazy! Keep yourself healthy physically (working out has done wonders for me with my motivation in other areas of my life) and mentally. And if you aren't feeling ok then go talk to someone! Heck - talk to me!
Side note - if anyone ever needs to vent then feel free to comment. I will write back and want to be "here" to people looking for help. I'm not psych major... but I am a mother major :) In fact, I should be getting my masters soon, right? 6 1/2 years in! lol :)
How do you spend your "you" time?
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